Happy Masturbation May pets!!! Are you having fun wanking those willies? Well if you are like the majority of my readers, your Willy is less whale and more of a minnow. So In celebration of Masturbation May, here are some masturbation tips for the tiny dicked!

Just Use Two Fingers: For some reason, many microdicked bitches like to wrap their entire hand around their dickies. As funny as it is to see that thing disappearing and as much as I love reminding them that real men, like my boyfriend, have cocks that even TWO hands won’t completely cover… Using your entire hand on a small penis is a bit excessive and really limits your masturbation techniques. Try cutting back to just a finger or two. Then you can actually stroke.

Put a ring on it: Ever wonder what it feels like to have a big pussy stretching cock? While you are stuck with that pin prick the rest of your life using a cock ring will increase your girth and give your pee pee a veiny appearance. Almost like the real thing! Many men report that they feel absolutely huge while wearing a ring. They do make them in extra small sizes, so even you itty bitties can join in the fun.

Mini Bananas: Like the above tip, this is one for those bitches who wonder what it would be like if they had a full sized bar instead of their “fun sized” candy cocklette. Specifically so they could feel what it would be like to slip it to a woman and have it actually feel tight. Next time you are at the grocery store, pick up a bunch of mini bananas. When you get home, slice off one end and squeeze the fruit out. Pop the skin in the microwave for 5 – 10 seconds (check with your finger for hot spots) and then slip that fruit sleeve over your shrimp dick and have fun hand humping.

Because let’s face it, when you have a tiny cock, you are pretty much destined to be with Polly Palm for the rest of your life!

Want More Masturbation May Fun? Be sure to check out Ms. Vivian’s blog tomorrow to answer the question “If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?”